A question of courtesy... (fwd)

[Wayne Precht <wayne@tiber.ed.umuc.edu>]

Poster: Wayne Precht <wayne@tiber.ed.umuc.edu>

Greetings to the Merry Rose from Galmr, 

The following message was sent to me from someone who doesn't have regular 
email access but, has an active interest in some of the current topics.  
Please read on --


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There is a time and a place for comments about a person's character; 
mostly this time is limited to courtrooms, documentaries and funerals.  
Basing one's opinion (and opinion is of limited value here) on the 
*opinions* of others is, at least, self-degenerating, and shows lack of 
initiative in actually getting to know the person in question.
 
There has been enough *character cutting* in this kingdom, despite the 
supposed natural tendancies and the great quantity of ever-growing 
negative material available.  Have we forgotten what our one common hobby 
is here, and what it stands for? What happened to the basic principles 
that The Society is based upon? Last I understood, the code of Courtesy 
still has a distinct place in this *game*, infact, the the mainstay of a 
Chivalrous society. 
 
As a Lady of the Rose, I am aware of too many examples of poor behavior, 
too many instances of rudeness, and far too many people simply lacking 
manners.  (It can't be lack of effort - it takes much more energy to be 
rude than it does to be polite, your mother probably told you this.)
 
Too much of the effort lately has been to find fault in someone else; 
take a look at yourself and see if you don't have a *character problem*. 
Are your efforts only on the battlefields? Or have you simply not 
learned to be courteous.
 
I would like to invite each of you to a challenge, if that is all you 
understand.  Before you have a negative thing to say to or about someone 
else, stop and think.  Think if there will be any *good* coming out of 
the situation. Think about the effect it might have on people who 
overhear you.  Think about yourself and what may cause you to think in a 
negative way.  Think about the way a negative comment may make the 
situation worse or hurt feelings. And mostly, please, think about the way 
you would have people think about you if all these negative things come 
out of your mouth. 

Negative opinions of people are useless.  If you can't think of something 
nice to say, don't say anything (my mother *did* say this, alot).  
 
Please, it is time to stop with the rude comments, either in person, 
privately, or electronically; (I doubt half of the negative comments ever 
written could be spoken face to face anyway.)
 
I have kept my name from this letter, it should not matter, though I 
would be happy to address any concerns you may have in this regard. 
Please know that I care about what you say and who is effected by every 
word.  It's my job to be concerned. 
 
Best wishes.

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