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Out-of-period Humor - the final frontier (fwd)

Poster: "Chuck Graves" <chuck_graves@mail.hq.faa.gov>

     Hi, folks.
     This was priceless.
     Hope to see you at Pennsic,

______________________________ Forward Header __________________________________
Subject: Humor - the final frontier (fwd)
Author:  billie jolene graves <bgraves@wam.umd.edu> at smtpgate
Date:    8/8/96 11:42 PM

I thought you might like this.
---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: Tue, 09 Jul 1996 23:39:49 +0000 (MULTINET_TIMEZONE) 
From: ADDISON LOONEY <aclooney@ichange.com>
Subject: Humor - the final frontier
This got sent to Addison and myself.  Thought you might enjoy. 
Title: More Net humor.
Date: Monday, July 08, 1996  8:33pm
From: Michael J. Kennedy
To: Suzanne Berry, Eric Boughton, April Bower, Robin Brown, Charlaine 
Cook, NAVSOC Det Charlie, Rorik & Janina Dione, Laura Foster, Michael & 
MJ Houghton, Kristen Kopec, Karen & Frank Lassus, Gerry Letteney, 
Addison & Linda Looney, Andy Mills, Kathryn Newell, Carol Smith, Jerry 
Stout, Patti Watkinson, Graham Watt, Tzippora Wilde
Subject: Jeff Foxworthy Meets Star Trek
Unattributed humor forwarded from a friend on the net: 
Your Starship Captain just might be a redneck if...
 - your shuttlecraft has been up on blocks for over a month
 - he paints flames and a NRA sticker on the warp nacelles
 - you have a shuttle called "Billy Joe Bob"
 - he refers to Klingons as "Critters"
 - he refers to Photon Torpedoes as "Popguns"
 - he has the sensor array repaired with a bent coathanger and aluminum
            <Didn't I see Scotty do this once before?>
 - he installs a set of bullhorns on the front of the saucer section
 - he says "Got your ears on, good buddy" instead of "open hailing
 - he hangs fuzzy dice over the viewscreen
 - he rewires his communicator into his belt buckle
 - he keeps a six-pack under his command chair and a gun rack above it
 - he says "Yee-Ha!" instead of "Engage"
 - he has a hand-tooled holster for his phaser
 - he insists on calling his executive officer "Bubba"
 - he sets the fore viewscreen to reruns of "Bassmaster"
 - he programs the food replicator for beer, ribs, and turnip greens
 - he paints the starship John Deere green
 - he refers to a Pulsar as a "Blue Light Special"
 - he refers to the Mutara Nebula as a "swamp"
 - his moonshine is stronger than Romulan Ale
 - he sings "Lucille" instead of "Kathleen"
 - his idea of dress uniform is CLEAN bib overalls
 - he wears mirrored shades on the Bridge
 - his idea of a "gas giant" is that big ol' XO Bubba after a meal of 
   and weenies
 - he sets phaser to "Cajun"
    I am Homer Simpson of Borg.   Resistance is fut.... Hmmm... donut!
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Date: Tue, 09 Jul 1996 10:30:12 +1000 (GST)
From: "Michael J. Kennedy" <mkennedy@kuentos.guam.net> 
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Subject: More Net humor.
To: Suzanne Berry <sberry@cpcug.org>, Eric Boughton 
<ebot@Kuentos.Guam.NET>, April Bower <BOWER.APRIL_I+@WASHINGTON.VA.GOV>,
 Robin Brown <robnbrwn@compassrose.com>, Charlaine Cook 
<CHARLAINE.C.COOK@sprintintl.sprint.com>, NAVSOC Det Charlie 
<nsocdetc@kuentos.guam.net>, Rorik & Janina Dione 
<ggoose@access.digex.net>, Laura Foster <Berleykm@aol.com>, Michael & MJ
 Houghton <herveus@access.digex.net>, Kristen Kopec <kkopec@erols.com>, 
Karen & Frank Lassus <lassus@ppcc.cccoes.edu>, Gerry Letteney 
<gerry_letteney@sterling.com>, Addison & Linda Looney 
<aclooney@ichange.com>, Andy Mills <amills@kuentos.guam.net>, Kathryn 
Newell <72123.411@compuserve.com>, Carol Smith <cssmith@richnet.com>, 
Jerry Stout <jstout@ite.net>, Patti Watkinson <PWATKINS@LEO.VSLA.EDU>, 
Graham Watt <graham@gol.com>, Tzippora Wilde <tzippi@Kuentos.Guam.NET>

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