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Out-of-period Humor - the final frontier (fwd)
Poster: "Chuck Graves" <chuck_graves@mail.hq.faa.gov>
Hi, folks.
This was priceless.
Hope to see you at Pennsic,
Tadhg
______________________________ Forward Header __________________________________
Subject: Humor - the final frontier (fwd)
Author: billie jolene graves <bgraves@wam.umd.edu> at smtpgate
Date: 8/8/96 11:42 PM
I thought you might like this.
Love,
Jolene
---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: Tue, 09 Jul 1996 23:39:49 +0000 (MULTINET_TIMEZONE)
From: ADDISON LOONEY <aclooney@ichange.com>
Subject: Humor - the final frontier
This got sent to Addison and myself. Thought you might enjoy.
Linda
Title: More Net humor.
Date: Monday, July 08, 1996 8:33pm
From: Michael J. Kennedy
To: Suzanne Berry, Eric Boughton, April Bower, Robin Brown, Charlaine
Cook, NAVSOC Det Charlie, Rorik & Janina Dione, Laura Foster, Michael &
MJ Houghton, Kristen Kopec, Karen & Frank Lassus, Gerry Letteney,
Addison & Linda Looney, Andy Mills, Kathryn Newell, Carol Smith, Jerry
Stout, Patti Watkinson, Graham Watt, Tzippora Wilde
Subject: Jeff Foxworthy Meets Star Trek
Unattributed humor forwarded from a friend on the net:
------------------------------------------------------
Your Starship Captain just might be a redneck if...
- your shuttlecraft has been up on blocks for over a month
- he paints flames and a NRA sticker on the warp nacelles
- you have a shuttle called "Billy Joe Bob"
- he refers to Klingons as "Critters"
- he refers to Photon Torpedoes as "Popguns"
- he has the sensor array repaired with a bent coathanger and aluminum
foil
<Didn't I see Scotty do this once before?>
- he installs a set of bullhorns on the front of the saucer section
- he says "Got your ears on, good buddy" instead of "open hailing
frequencies"
- he hangs fuzzy dice over the viewscreen
- he rewires his communicator into his belt buckle
- he keeps a six-pack under his command chair and a gun rack above it
- he says "Yee-Ha!" instead of "Engage"
- he has a hand-tooled holster for his phaser
- he insists on calling his executive officer "Bubba"
- he sets the fore viewscreen to reruns of "Bassmaster"
- he programs the food replicator for beer, ribs, and turnip greens
- he paints the starship John Deere green
- he refers to a Pulsar as a "Blue Light Special"
- he refers to the Mutara Nebula as a "swamp"
- his moonshine is stronger than Romulan Ale
- he sings "Lucille" instead of "Kathleen"
- his idea of dress uniform is CLEAN bib overalls
- he wears mirrored shades on the Bridge
- his idea of a "gas giant" is that big ol' XO Bubba after a meal of
beans
and weenies
- he sets phaser to "Cajun"
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I am Homer Simpson of Borg. Resistance is fut.... Hmmm... donut!
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Date: Tue, 09 Jul 1996 10:30:12 +1000 (GST)
From: "Michael J. Kennedy" <mkennedy@kuentos.guam.net>
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Subject: More Net humor.
To: Suzanne Berry <sberry@cpcug.org>, Eric Boughton
<ebot@Kuentos.Guam.NET>, April Bower <BOWER.APRIL_I+@WASHINGTON.VA.GOV>,
Robin Brown <robnbrwn@compassrose.com>, Charlaine Cook
<CHARLAINE.C.COOK@sprintintl.sprint.com>, NAVSOC Det Charlie
<nsocdetc@kuentos.guam.net>, Rorik & Janina Dione
<ggoose@access.digex.net>, Laura Foster <Berleykm@aol.com>, Michael & MJ
Houghton <herveus@access.digex.net>, Kristen Kopec <kkopec@erols.com>,
Karen & Frank Lassus <lassus@ppcc.cccoes.edu>, Gerry Letteney
<gerry_letteney@sterling.com>, Addison & Linda Looney
<aclooney@ichange.com>, Andy Mills <amills@kuentos.guam.net>, Kathryn
Newell <72123.411@compuserve.com>, Carol Smith <cssmith@richnet.com>,
Jerry Stout <jstout@ite.net>, Patti Watkinson <PWATKINS@LEO.VSLA.EDU>,
Graham Watt <graham@gol.com>, Tzippora Wilde <tzippi@Kuentos.Guam.NET>
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