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Re: HelpLine <<<<< FLAG UP!>>>>>

Poster: rmhowe <magnusm@ncsu.edu>

P.Van Dyke wrote, One word changed and passed on by M. Magnus Malleus:
(In agreement with efen (O the SHAME of it!))

(click..sound tape of recording)

    Hello and Welcome to the Kingdom Psychiatric Hotline..
Sorry we can't come to the phone, but please pick from the following

If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly!

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2!

If you have multiple-personallites. please press 3, 4, 5, and 6!

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will
   tell you which number to push!

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press.
   No one will answer.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want.
   Just stay on the line so we can trace the call.

If your life is hopeless, all is doomed, and you believe it's all over.
   Get on knees and PRAY HARD and the PEERS will call and make it

Hope this helps, Thank You for calling the Kingdom Psychiatric
                    ( Call again if you can! )
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