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Joke - Digging Bigger Holes - Alternate Atlantian Awards
Poster: rmhowe <email@example.com>
Jessica Rechtschaffer wrote:
> Poster: Jessica Rechtschaffer <firstname.lastname@example.org>
> > In Response to old joke:
> > If The King of Atlantia said "Someone dig me a trench" the response
> > would be: Yes your majesty. I did a little research on period trenches
> > on the internet and came up with over fifteen thousand hits and would
> > like to give you a brief overview of each one. Also I would like to ask
> > that when we are done we make an award of the Royal Order of the
> > Imperial Shovel(The Purple Spade).
> It would have to be an award named after something nautical. Afterall,
> 90% of the awards are named for some sort of sea creature or other aquatic
> life. :)
> Isn't there a "shovel fish" of some sort. It has a head like a shovel. I
> remember I seeing one at an aquarium many years ago.
Well, there might also be:
The Hammerhead - which seems appropriate for long term squires.
The Shark - fighters rarely see their shots coming.
The Archerfish - which spits at it's prey out of water, very fine shots.
The Spearfish, or Sea Snake - for the accomplished polearm fighters.
The Narwhal - for the most poke-proof of rapier fighter hides.
The Stingray - who enlightens these individuals - sooner or later.
The Snapper - self explanatory.
The Pufferfish - for the reallly longwinded Court Heralds.
The Angler Fish - for those noticably mostly in search of awards.
The Remora - for only the most devoted Leeches. (Chirurgeons)
The Lionfish - for the outstanding of peacocks, fops, and dancers.
The Sea Cucumber - for the most obviously available and needy of
(Usually short lived once notice is taken and the frenzy begins.)
The Sea Slug - for the most undesired of availables. (Read Lounge
The Octopus is a higher level of this same award. Very difficult to
(Also given for those buttonholers who grab Hats at inappropriate
times to discuss those very odd matters of dubious import.)
The Sawfish - for those who fall noticeably asleep during courts.
The Needlefish - for the nimble fingered.
The Squid - to encourage the messiest of Calligraphers. Usually
The Guppie - for those bred within the Society, and not trawlled for.
The Great Blue Whale - for the crown list retired Dukes, mostly products
the Atlantian Breeding Program (tm).
- and -
The Angelfish - for those particularly helpful sweet young thangs.
Magnus, think I'll go hide now....did I miss anybody?
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- From: Jessica Rechtschaffer <firstname.lastname@example.org>