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SCA Horoscope




Poster: "Brown, Tracey" <tbrown@charlotte.glenayre.com>


 ---------- Forwarded message ----------
Subject: Too Funny to Pass up

YOUR SCA HOROSCOPE
 -adapted by Ioseph of Locksley  copyright 1989 W.J.Bethancourt III

                              *
STICK JOCK: Jan 20 - Feb 18
You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You lie a 
great deal, and your friends suspect you of favoring Parliament. You tend to 
be careless and impractical, making the same mistakes repeatedly. People 
think you are stupid. You will
never be a Knight.

PIMP: Feb 19 - Mar 20
You have a vivid imagination, and often fear that people really do care. You 
have a small amount of influence over your associates, and people resent you 
for flaunting your power. You lack confidence.  Pimp people use duct tape on 
small animals a lot.

PILE OF DOGSTUFF: Mar 20 - Ap 19
You are the pioneer type and hold most people in contempt. You are quick 
tempered, and scornful of advice. You are a real jerk. You are the Seneshal. 
 Learn to sleep holding a dagger; you'll need it.

MONGOL: Ap 20 - May 20
You are practical and persistent. You have dogged determination and work 
like hell. Most people think you are stubborn and bull headed. You are a 
Marshal.  Everyone hates your guts, and are gunning for you next Tourney.

THREE STARS THAT LOOK LIKE NOTHING IN PARTICULAR: May 21 - Jun 20
You are a quick and intelligent thinker. People like you because you buy the 
beer. However, you are inclined to expect too much for too little. This 
means you are cheap. You are also easy, and a Herald.

PLAGUE: Jun 21 - July 22
You are sympathetic, and understanding of people's problems. They think you 
are a sucker. You are. You are always putting things off, and that's why you 
will always be on welfare, and never worth a damn.  You are a throne-toadie, 
and a Laurel. Why are you
even here? Don't sleep with daggers: you'll hurt yourself.

RAT: Jul 23 - Aug 22
You consider yourself a born leader, while others think you are pushy. Most 
Rats are bullies. You are vain, and cannot tolerate honest criticism. Your 
arrogance is disgusting. Rat people grow up to be Fubba-Wubbas, or Dukes.

TOAD: Aug 23 - Sept 22
You are the logical type, and hate disorder. This nitpicking makes your 
friends crazy. You are cold and unemotional, and often fall asleep while 
making love. You are a Seneshal and a Pelican.

LOONY: Sept 23 - Oct 22
You are the artistic type and have a difficult time with reality. Your 
chances of advancement in the SCA are excellent. Loonies die of strange and 
unknown diseases, and pictures of their dead bodies are published in medical 
magazines.

GIBBET: Oct 23 - Nov 21
You are shrewd in merchant matters, and cannot be trusted. You shall achieve 
the pinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics. Most Gibbets 
are murdered in their beds, because they refuse to sleep clutching knives.

CAVALIER: Nov 22 - Dec 21
You are optimistic and enthusiastic, and rely a great deal on dumb luck, 
since you lack talent. People laugh at you a lot. You will do well as a 
Field Herald, or in the Dark Horde.

COCKROACH: Dec 22 - Jan 19
You are conservative, and afraid of taking chances.  You don't do much of 
anything, and are lazy. You will never be King, or Queen. There has never 
been a Cockroach of any importance. You should avoid standing in one place, 
as you tend to attract pigeons. You are probably a Baron. You don't know 
which end of a dagger to hold.
_____________________________________________________
Kate Field / Kathryn Beathag
"He and I only had one thing in common...and I won!" Unnamed Source
"Hey Mister.  We are those freaks"   The Craft
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