Re: Discussion: netiquette (was re: young people)

["Sharon Henderson" <sharon@intercon.com>]

Lady Dragonfyr writes:

> Kate, I thank you for your kind words...however several of the 
> "gentles" of this list have flamed me privately via e-mail....words 
> like jerk, a**hole and get a life were used.  I was told that 
> the gentleman's reputation is spotless and his courtesy unquestioned and 
> I had some nerve to attack him in this fashion.  My reputation was 
> called into question and I have been not too subtlely informed that 
> even the dimmest of dullards knows where and when he is neither wanted 
> nor welcome.  I am unsubscribing to the list....I was unaware 
> that Atlantia was this type of place. I have even been chastized from 
> the throne, unfairly I feel, but chastized nonetheless. I *ASSUMED* 
> that having been a member of the list for a while that it was 
> appropriate for me to respond in a joking manner to what I assmed from 
> the header to be an amusing subject. I assumed this from his comment 
> that young women were used to recruit after the age of 18......tho 
> my first thought was less than innocent.  I am sorry that my comments 
> were the basis of an off-topic list mail and humbly aplogize to you 
> and anyone else I may have offended.  If you so desire you may repost 
> this with my permission, however I will not be here to see it. 
>  
> Again, my thanks for your kind words. 
>  
> Louise 
> aka Tamira Andemar 
> Lady Dragonfyr of Draconmere (formerly Hudson County, NJ) 


THIS is entirely unacceptable, folks.  I mean, for heaven's sake--we can all 
agree to disagree, but treating ANYONE like this, privately or publicly, is 
just not fair, hardly courteous, and not a smitch chivalrous.  Please, please 
-- those who have used such unkind language, please consider writing to Louise 
to apologize, and everybody else just apologize and make nice to everybody 
else?  And if further comment must be made on the subject at hand, I beg of 
you let it be courteous.

The rules of discussion and debate do not allow for invective, which is one of 
the best reasons why such rules are in place, because they prevent the 
slinging of epithet and mud.  This is a list of similarly-hobbified 
individuals, not a major political campaign; we're not trying to "win" or make 
someone else "lose" an argument.

Then, could we all please go back to discussing something pleasant?  In the 
last few days, amid the invective, we've had discussions of period locks, 
canvas, cotehardies, the Pennsic Which Approacheth, upcoming events, and Their 
Highnesses' upcoming tourney.  This is why we're here!!  Brok and Miriam added 
a new little Badgerling to the fold; we should be rejoicing!  Somewhere, some 
of our number might have unwell relations, or recently been in a car wreck, or  
have some other thing going on, over which they could use some fellow-feeling; 
I remember back a while ago, when my husband and son were almost killed in an 
accident, some SCAdian found out and told some other folks, such that I got 
all kinds of nice messages, flowers, cards, and offers of help.  What has 
happened to this loving attitude?

Atlantia is not, deep down, the "kind of place" Louise has been led to believe 
it is by these current acrimonies.  I know.  I have seen the compassion, 
friendliness, acceptance, and kindness of this kingdom, and not just locally 
in the Northern Reaches of the Kingdom.  Please, let's bring back the Atlantia 
we know we have out there somewhere -- and let's bring back the Merry Rose 
that we know we have.

Lady Louise, please don't go.  Come back if you have already signed off; 
consider giving us all another chance to rediscover our manners, if you're 
still here.

In Service to the Crown, the Realm, the Dream, and us all,
Meli ferch Iasper
(Sharon Henderson)

 

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