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A Viking Christmas Carol
Poster: "Patrick Schenning" <email@example.com>
I don't know if this is old or new, but its the first time I've seen it so I felt I should share it. Enjoy and happy holidays.
Dun Carraig Pursuvant Extrordinary
> >A Viking Christmas Carol
>> >'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the Hall
>> >Not a creature was stirring, not warrior nor thrall.
>> >And I in my armor, my greaves and my helm
>> >Was drunker than anyone else in the Realm.
>> >I staggered upstairs and fell into bed
>> >While four quarts of mead were ablaze in my head.
>> >Then up from below came the sounds of a brawl
>> >So I grabbed up my axe and ran down to the Hall.
>> >I missed the last step and crashed down in a heap
>> >Thinking, "Why can't those low-lifes downstairs go to sleep!"
>> >When what to my wondering eyes should appear
>> >But two brawny strangers, wielding mallet and spear.
>> >I said to myself, "We'll soon have them beat!"
>> >Then I noticed ten warriors laid out at their feet.
>> >I gave out a yell and leapt into the fray...
>> >I'll always regret my poor choice of that day.
>> >For the one laid his hammer to the side of my nose
>> >And up, up, up to the rafters I rose.
>> >Then came a lone frightened voice from the floor,
>> >"Those are no mortal warriors -- that's Odin and Thor!"
>> >Then they looked at each other and they said, "Battle's done.
>> >Now they know who we are, it no longer is fun."
>> >Then Thor raised his hammer, and his elbow he bent,
>> >And with a loud crash, through the ceiling they went.
>> >I crawled through the Hall and flung open the door,
>> >Not really sure that I'd seen them before.
>> >The snow bathed in starlight, the moon like a glede,
>> >I saw them ride off on an eight-legged steed.
>> >And I heard them exclaim, 'ere they flew out of sight,
>> >"TO HELA WITH CHRISTMAS, WE JUST LOVE A GOOD FIGHT!"
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