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Netiquette, Part 2
Melys wrote: [chunks snipped to save space]
unto the merry rose, from melys, greetings!
i've been sitting on this letter for a week or so now, watching
accusations of offensiveness and discourtesy swirl around the list,
and i've finally got it into sufficiently coherent form to post.
there's a fair amount of verbiage here that some people will find only
peripherally related to the list; i think netiquette is list-related
because the list is on the net, but i'm aware that some people would
disagree. if you're one of them, you can stop reading here... :)
he didn't offend "the public" - he made a public remark which offended
one person, who then tried to discipline him in public for her
personal indignation. parents occasionally use that form of
discipline on their children; imho, for one adult to attempt to use it
on another is insulting, because it implies that the recipient of the
attempted discipline is incapable of judging what may or may not be
said in public. small children are subject to this form of discipline
because they're not old enough to know what one says and doesn't say;
to assume the same of an adult is in itself discourteous.
if the lady in question found his remarks offensive to her personally,
she had every right to contact him IN PRIVATE and express her
discomfort. to say that she should "attempt to correct his behavior"
assumes both that she has authority over him as an individual and that
she has an authoritative standard for appropriate behavior in general.
Gosh a'mosey, didn't I JUST get done saying this, oh, could it have
been as long ago as YESTERDAY?
Of course, that really didn't involve everybody else.
Well, NOW IT DOES.
There are some decisions that need to be made concerning what CAN and
CAN'T be said, under what conditions, and I, for one, fully support
Melys' version, (and TRH Logan's, for that matter)
to wit: If anybody decides to take seriously whatever is said in a
fashion that is CLEARLY intended for amusement, I don't have much
sympathy, especially if they take it PERSONALLY.
Otherwise, a LOT of people are going to stop talking altogether for
fear that SOMEBODY won't be amused.
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