Re: Discussion: netiquette (was re: young people)

[Thomas Hudson <hudson@cs.unc.edu>]

Lady Aislynn Fyrlocc writes:

> On the contrary, my lady, I feel it is the duty of people to point out 
> offensive behavior.  A community determines standards of acceptable behavior 
> by the words and actions of the community _in public_.  Everyone is entitled 
> to express their opinions.  But that includes the right of someone to tell 
> someone else they found their words offensive.          
> 
> If his comments were made to her in private, only then should she have 
> limited her comments to a private response.  I myself have made the mistake 
> of responding publicly to what turned out to be a private e-mail.  The 
> misunderstanding was genuine, but I still apologized to the gentleman.  (He 
> gracefully forgave me for my error.) But since the lord's comments were 
> public, she was justified in her public response.

Good lady, a dissent:

  My opinion is that a public exposure may be warranted if the transgressor
fails to respond to private email.  Public reproof may also be warranted in
cases of extreme trespass, but as we've seen the community standard (or a
vocal segment of the community) seems not to consider what occured
sufficiently extreme to warrant being slapped down that hard.  This is
especially true here at Cheapside, or on the Rialto, when people often take
things in senses they were not meant, and we do not have the same judgement
of our audience we might have in face-to-face situations to allow us to
temper our words to fit.

> "I'll say what I want (or do what I want) when and where I want regardless of 
> other's opinions/feelings" is not the mark of a courteous, honorable person, 
> and that mindset should not be tolerated by a community that prides itself on 
> chivalry and respect.  I'm not talking Political Correctness here, just 
> common courtesy.                                           

  There is a balance to be struck.

Giovan
Kappellenberg, Windmaster's Hill, Atlantia
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