Re: Jobs and Cookies

["Heather Swann" <swann@intercon.com>]

Poster: "Heather Swann" <swann@intercon.com>

> Do people who succeed at whatever they do want to be recognized as 
> having succeeded? Yes.  But the only person anyone has true control 
> over is themselves.  If someone hates jumping through hoops, but 
> believes that by jumping through certain hoops they will get a cookie 
> from someone, then they will feel unhappy and disappointed if that 
> someone happens to be looking the other way during the performance.  
> On the other hand if the act of jumping through hoops makes the 
> person happy and they keep doing it because they do it well and it 
> feels right, then they will be happy with their actions despite 
> the disappointment at not being recognized.  Although I suspect that 
> the more one enjoys something, the more one does it, and therefore 
> there is more chance that someone will notice the successes and 
> reward with a cookie. 
>  
> Should people have to go through a level of bureaucracy adding more 
> work to their job so they have a warrant which has no effect on whether 
> or not they get a cookie? No.  The extra work will not bother those 
> who enjoy the paperwork, but it's possible that there are some who 
> simply enjoy doing the web pages and do not want the extra work.  
> As I recall from the discussion earlier, whether someone's web page 
> is warranted or not is their decision, thus solving the 
> previous difficulty. 
>  
> Just my two cents 
>  
> Nancy Dalton 
> ska Earnwynn van Zwaluwenburg 
>  
Actually, in terms of cookies and hoops, I think we have (at least to some 
extent) a mindset which is unhealthy.  I've had this discussion with Laurels 
and Pelicans and Knights before as well as some members of the general 
populace, being of the general populace myself, and it comes down to this, 
imho:

Milord Newbie gets into the SCA and is having a fine time being helpful/
fighting/learning an art or science.  This continues until Milord N gets 
pretty good at bh/f/laaos.  Folks start to watch Milord N.  Now it happens 
that folks want to encourage Milord N. This is not necessarily a bad thing.  
 Milord N has always enjoyed doing what he does, and has had no thought to 
awards.  At this point, people start saying 'When you get your ___', 'I'm sure 
you'll get a _____', and 'It usually takes __________ effort and _____time to 
get a _______, and you've definitely done that'.  They say these things over 
and over around Milord N, who is a decent guy and tries to ignore all this, 
and requests that folks please stop making these comments.  
Over a period of a couple of years or so, Milord N sees several people whose 
merits are not obvious and who have been in for a shorter time get all manner 
of cookies, seemingly without doing the work.  Milord N starts to feel 
overlooked, perhaps a bit resentful, and feels his earnest effort is not 
appreciated.  Add to this the fact that people no longer bother to thank him 
or show appreciation for what he does.  And then to cap it off, people assume 
he already has a ______, so no one bothers to recommend him.  
Milord N takes a break from the Society to regain his good feeling toward it.  
Milord N's previous work is forgotten, so when he does show up again, it has 
ceased to 'count' toward whatever award people thought he should get in the 
first place.  
I have seen this happen over and over, and it's very sad.  I had a Laurel ask 
me, "Well then what can I say to encourage someone?"  I think the answer is to 
admire their work, thank them for making your experience of the SCA a more 
interesting one, and point out more avenues for research or practice.  Once 
you mention awards, no matter how innocently, it seems to start this downward 
slide.  
It made me nuts when people would say, "When you get your Dolphin..." to me.  
It implies that everyone gets one sooner or later, and that there is a 
schedule for it, and you might be falling behind.  It makes it sound like a 
merit badge. It also implies that that's why you do what you do, and you're 
just a trained dog jumping through hoops.  And no matter how long you put your 
fingers in your ears and say 'lalala' and try to ignore it, sooner or later it 
gets to you, and detracts from your SCA experience.  
I don't mean to offend anyone here, and I realize this may just be my 
experience, but if it is a more general experience, and I think it might be, 
then we need to work toward a solution.  This perceived inequity in how the 
game is played often leads to a lessened 'fun factor', and that's why we're in 
this in the first place........

Sorry this is such a long post....I didn't mean to babble on so long!  I just 
wanted to be sure I was being clear on this point.

Thank you.

Miri

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